I’m sitting here picking at my chicken, listening to Pierce the Veil.
let me explain how i got to this point.
I was so tired today that i wanted to stay home. so i did, although i regret it. i woke up at 6:30 because my sister came in my room & asked me what am i still doing in bed.
i really don’t understand why i keep on missing my alarm. i know it’s going off, but i think something inside of me is pressing the “i’m awake” button on my phone. which is making me be late, missing school, or missing the bus. & it’s seriously starting to piss me off.
i need to step my game up.
i texting Thomas to let him know that i’m not coming to school, which made him in a bad mood all day. go team go. i fell back asleep. then i woke up again, and checked my phone, i got a few texts from some people, and i went into the kitchen where my mom said “what are you doing home” with a little surprised jump added. but not a good jump.
i lied saying i didn’t feel good, like i told my sister. when really, i was just too tired.
what’s wrong with me?
anyway, back to my day. i got cereal, ate it, went back to my room, ate it, and subconsciously fell back asleep, which wasn’t my intentions. i didn’t wake up on my own this time, i woke up from rucuss occurring in my house & outside of my bedroom window.
i thought it was a nightmare, something other than reality when i found out that Brittany was moving back in.. D: go figure.
so now, we have my dad, mom, brother, sister, other sister, her baby, 5 dogs & i. in a 4 bedroom house. i want to die. oh, and don’t forget my brothers baby & her mama dropping by here & there.
there is just too much. i want to leave.
i have to go to the guidance counselor tomorrow. during science i guess. although i really need to get my grade up in there, and i am the only one in there who does good. i couldn’t borrow someones journal because i’m the only one i trust.
is that bad? that i’m the only one i trust? i guess i’ll find out.
anyway. i heard a male voice come into my room ask if katelyn was still sleeping. i’m katelyn. i didn’t know who it was, i assumed it was Brittany’s “boyfriend” because she was there with her baby, so i pretended to sleep, because me & him aren’t on good terms.
afterwards i looked out my window & seen that it was Justin, my other sisters boyfriend. so i called my other sister & explained why i pretended i was sleeping, and apologized. because me & Justin are EXTREMELY close.
he’s like an older brother to me, although he was in jail for 3 years.
i hung out in the family room for a little bit.
ate.
and took care of brittany’s baby since she doesn’t have motherly instincts and doesn’t know what her baby wants.
it’s weird.
i’m 15 almost 16 and i have more motherly instincts than a 22 yr old with a baby..
don’t ask.
any way. i called Joan back, and asked if she could take me to practice, and she said no.
so instead i had my own little “awkward” marathon in my room.
[awkward is a MTV show]
—until my boyfriend got out of school.
talked to him for a little while.
got a shower.
drove to get my birth control pills.
and came home,
to picking at my chicken, listening to pierce the veil.
signed,
rantrantrant.
